From La Barrière to Knowledge

It was in the grand state drawing room of Crestignac that La DdC yesterday presented the Golden Warthog to Professor Paul Marcus de La Barrière, in recognition of a lifetime devoted to the study of the hummingbird hawk-moth.

Before members of the government, representatives of the Haute Université de Crestignac and several researchers who remained anonymous out of budgetary modesty, His Highness presented the professor with a gold statuette depicting a warthog in motion.

Deeply moved, Paul Marcus de La Barrière accepted the distinction with the caution of a man accustomed to observing phenomena that disappear whenever he tries to approach them.

For more than seventy years, the professor has studied the hummingbird hawk-moth, that elusive creature capable of remaining motionless while beating its wings, then departing before the observer can confirm its presence.

His early work established that the hummingbird hawk-moth can be seen without necessarily having been looked at. He went on to demonstrate that its absence from a photograph did not constitute proof of its absence at the moment the photograph was taken.

This discovery, now regarded as one of the foundations of entomological nonnology, gave rise to the celebrated La Barrière principle:

The professor continued his research at the Centre crestignacien d’observation stationnaire des espèces rapides. For several decades, he remained seated in the same spot to determine whether the hummingbird hawk-moth would eventually return.

It returned.

The exact time has never been established.

In the address, La DdC paid tribute to “a man who has devoted his life to pursuing knowledge without ever seeking to catch up with it”.

Near the podium, a likeness of the hummingbird hawk-moth had been installed so that the public could at last observe it without its flying away. No incidents were reported.

The Minister of Education, Buskin, meanwhile announced that the professor’s work would soon be incorporated into school curricula. Asked which level this would concern, he specified that teaching would begin “as soon as pupils had acquired the ability to remain still while moving forward”.

Crestignac’s highest scientific distinction, the Golden Warthog honours those who have made a decisive contribution to a deeper understanding of a question that remains unanswered.

The statuette presented to the professor depicts a warthog striding resolutely towards a destination that appears on no map. It bears the motto:

At the close of the ceremony, Paul Marcus de La Barrière returned to his usual table, accompanied by his notebook, his pen and a coffee that had by then gone cold.

A hummingbird hawk-moth was reportedly spotted near the flowers arranged in the grand drawing room. The professor, who was facing the other way, declined to confirm the report.

In Crestignac, knowledge had once again crossed La Barrière.